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And Then You Fly Page 24
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Bree watched Jace’s fiery gaze sweep over her body, as he stripped his clothes away. She closed her eyes, waiting to feel him rest on top of her.
“Open your eyes and look at me,” he demanded. When she did, he was so close to her. His eyes trained on hers relentlessly. “I want to know it’s me you see, me making love to you. No one else.”
“I see you Jace” she said, and gasped as he entered her. She dragged her nails down his back, and felt his body shudder. His slow, gentle movement suddenly changed. He quickened, bucking against her, slamming into her. He turned her brain to mush with his frantic, savage kisses. Soon, he threw his head back, and groaned. She felt him shudder again, as she tightened her interior muscles around him, coming with him.
He didn’t move off of her, but rested his body gently against hers. Bree ran her hands down his back, stroking his flawlessly hard body, until they rested just above his butt cheeks.
“Did you feel it?” he asked her.
“I think so, but did I feel what?”
“Best. Sex. Ever. Wanna know why?”
She giggled. “Why?”
He shifted suddenly, startling her, getting right in her face. “Because I love you.” His mouth descended on hers. Forcefully his lips claimed hers, as his body had staked it’s claim on her, in her, just moments before.
Chapter 21
“Happy Christmas Eve,” Jace kissed her good morning.
“Mmm. Happy Christmas Eve to you too.”
“How do you feel this morning?”
“Tired. A little sore. But sated. Very well sated.”
“I have a little surprise for you, but it requires getting out bed.”
“Can’t you just bring me breakfastin bed?” she smiled at him.
“I cannot, because breakfast is being served in Monument, and by the time I bring it back here, it will be cold.”
“Oh Jace,” she sat up suddenly. “I’m so sorry. You were leaving last night, and I stopped you. Do you want to go now? I mean I can—”
Jace kissed her, running his tongue along her bottom lip until she opened her mouth under his.
“Get up and get dressed woman, we need to get to Helena before Ben’s plane lands.”
“Ben’s plane? What are you talking about?”
“You know Ben has a plane, right?”
“Of course I do, but what does that have to do with us?”
“Because he’s flying up as we speak, to ferry us down to Monument for Christmas.”
“Really?” Bree squealed.
Jace smiled and pulled her out of bed. “Get dressed or we’ll be spending Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in Montana, in bed.”
She smiled at him from the passenger seat of his truck. “I can’t believe I’m going to be home for Christmas. Thank you Jace, so much, for making this happen.”
He reached over and brought her hand to his lips. “My pleasure ma’am.”
The awkwardness of his confession hung between them, unacknowledged. When he told her he loved her it wasn’t about the sex, he really did love her. There wasn’t any doubt in his mind. They’d made love again, then fell fast asleep, no more words spoken.
“It’s so beautiful here. I had no idea.” The ground was covered in snow, and the big Montana sky stretched on forever. Every so often the sun would peek out of the ominous clouds forming, making the snow glisten. “You must love it.”
He did love it, but would she? Could she? And for how long? “It’s isolated,” he muttered. “And cold.”
“Jace,” she laughed, “it sounds as though you don’t like it at all.”
“That isn’t it.”
Bree turned and looked at him. “What is it then?”
“It isn’t an easy life up here. Not everyone is cut out for it, that’s all.”
“I don’t understand. Are you angry with me about something?”
His face softened when he turned and looked at her. “No darlin’, I’m not angry with you.”
His voice was soft and sweet, but there was an underlying tension emanating from him that he couldn’t cover up with words.
“We’re here,” he said. He hit the call button at the gate to the private air strip.
“Can I help you?” the voice on the other side bellowed.
“Jace Rice here. Has Ben Rice arrived? He was going to let you know—”
The box squawked, and the gate creaked open.
“I guess he’s here,” Jace muttered and drove through the gate. “Would be nice if I knew where I was going.”
Jace’s phone rang and he snapped it up. “Yeah?” Pause. “Okay, great. Thanks.”
“Ben?”
“Yep. Guess he got the same warm welcome from the tower.”
Jace pulled the truck close to the hangar, where there was a sign for parking. “It’s a hike,” he said. “And it’s damn cold. I wish I could get you closer, but this is it.”
There was an edge to his voice she didn’t understand. He said he wasn’t angry with her, but something was clearly bothering him.
“I’ll be fine Jace.”
“I’ll get our bags, you go ahead. The plane is on the other side of this hangar, Ben will be waiting for you.”
“I can help, I’m not—”
He was out of the truck, the door slammed behind him before she could finish her sentence. She opened her door and understood why he slammed his shut. The wind whisked it away from her so strongly she thought it would rip it off the hinges. She managed to grab it with both hands and slam it closed.
“Go,” he motioned. “That way.”
Bree went in the direction he pointed. The snow was coming down hard, and it was difficult to walk into the wind. As she got closer to it, she saw a door open in the hangar.
“Come in here,” a voice shouted to her. Jace was right behind her when she got inside.
“Hey Ben, sorry to bring you into this weather,” Jace said shaking his hand.
“It’s okay. Hey Bree,” Ben hugged her.
“Can we fly?”
“Waiting for word. The guy in the control tower said the weather is supposed to pass, but he didn’t offer much more information about when.”
“He was abrupt,” added Jace.
“Yeah, you could say that,” Ben laughed.
“I’m real sorry about this,” Jace said again.
“No worse than we get in Crested Butte,” Ben answered, looking at his phone. “Looks like it might be quick. It isn’t much of a storm and it’s moving east. Come on over here, there’s a heater.”
Ben led them to a sitting area, furnished with a sofa that looked as old as Bree, and two ratty chairs.
“It isn’t much,” Ben said, noting the look on her face. “But it’s warm over here.”
“I don’t mind,” Bree sat on the arm of the sofa.
Jace took off his hat and ran his hand through his hair. “God, this is a clusterfuck. I’m sorry Bree.”
“You’re sorry? What for?”
“For livin’ out here in the middle of nowhere. For gettin’ you into this. You should be home, sitting by a fire, playin’ with Cochran. Not up here in a shit hole hangar, not knowin’ when we can even leave.”
“Wait just a minute,” she snapped, and then looked at Ben.
“I’ll just, uh, see if I can find a men’s room,” Ben walked away.
“Where is this coming from? You said you weren’t angry with me, but you’re sure acting as though you are. And as far as what I should be doing, I came here, remember? Surprised you? If anyone should be sorry, it’s me.”
Jace looked at her but didn’t answer. She stood and put her arms around his waist. “What is wrong? Please tell me. Is it because I didn’t—”
Jace pulled her arms from around his waist, and took a step away from her. “I’m tied here Bree. I can’t just walk away from it. It wouldn’t be fair to my parents. They aren’t cut out for doing this on their own. I can’t just abandoned them if you aren’t cut out for it either
.”
“If I’m not cut out for what?”
“Yeah, I guess I’m getting pretty far ahead of myself, aren’t I? I mean we haven’t even talked about why you’re here in the first place. Not really. I guess I shouldn’t go assuming anything about next week let alone the future.”
Bree sat back down on the arm of the sofa. “I’m not following you. I feel as though I’m supposed to read between the lines and figure out what you’re trying to say, but I’m lost.”
“You. Me. This place.” Jace’s voiced was raised, and he began pacing. “I live on a ranch darlin’, and when I’m not here, I’m in a rig pulling a slew of bulls and horses from one town to the next.
“It isn’t romantic. It’s damn hard work. It isn’t for everyone.”
“You’re right about one thing,” she stood and came toe to toe with him. “You’re doing a lot of assuming you shouldn’t be.”
“Yeah, right. I got it.” He turned his back to her and began to walk away.
“Wait a minute dammit.” She grabbed his arm. “Jace? What is wrong with you? Why are you acting like this?” Maybe shehadbeen wrong about him. But last night, he told her he loved her. Did he regret saying it? Was that why he was behaving this way? Her eyes filled with tears and she spun around, so he wouldn’t see. Why did she have to start crying? Now he would feel sorry for her, and they’d never get to the bottom of why he was acting the way he was.
“I understand if you don’t want me here. I should’ve called. I should’ve…well, there’s so much I should’ve done. I’m sorry Jace.”
“I want you in my life Bree. But the life I lead isn’t an easy one.”
“I can’t tell whether you’re saying this for my benefit or yours. If you don’t want this, just say so. Quit talking in circles.”
“I do want this, more than anything. But I have responsibilities I can’t just walk away from.”
“Have I asked you to?” What was it about her that made Jace believe she was asking him to change his life? Why had Zack thought the same thing?
“I’m me, and you’re you. Right Bree? I’m a rancher, and a rough stock contractor. I get dirty and I shovel a lot of shit in the course of a day. I made a commitment to my parents, and to my partners. I’m not in a position to renege.”
She felt as though she was talking to a brick wall. “Why do you keep saying that, as though I’m asking you to?”
“Why did you come here? What is that you want from me? If it’s casual sex, I gotta tell you, I can’t do it. Not anymore. I’m done bein’ the detour. I’m done bein’ the guy that offers comfort until you figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life, or find who you want to spend the rest of your life with.” He spun her around so she faced him. “I love you Bree. I know that might not mean much to you. You may think I was in love with Renie, and Blythe, I did too. But I wasn’t. Not like this. Nothing has ever felt like this.”
She couldn’t stop the flow of tears from her eyes. “Then why are you pushing me away?”
“I ache for you, do you understand that? Ache. I physically hurt knowing you don’t feel the same way about me as I feel about you. I want you every minute of every day, and when we’re together, I let myself get lost in you. I tell myself it’s different, each time. I let the fear go. Do you know how I felt when you called to say you were going to Idaho for Christmas? Do you?”
She was crying so hard she couldn’t answer.
“Do you?”
“I-I’m so sorry,” she hiccuped.
“Every time you pull away from me, you take another chunk out of my heart.”
“I don’t want to pull away Jace. I want this.”
“But for how long? This isn’t you, living on a ranch. And when you decide to leave, I’ll be left here with no choice but to board up that damn stained glass window all over again.”
“Stained glass window? What are you talking about?”
“The one in the stairwell. When Beiman’s wife left him, he couldn’t stand to look at it, so he boarded it up. I know now why he did.”
Bree stood in front of him, unable to speak, unable to do anything but cry. He said he wanted her, that he loved her, but he was convinced she either didn’t love him enough, or wasn’t strong enough to be what he needed. He’d already decided she couldn’t do it. He was so sure of it, he wouldn’t consider even trying.
“We’re good to go,” shouted Ben from the other side of the hangar. “Let’s get on our way before the weather turns bad again.”
Jace grabbed her bag and his. “Come on, let’s do this.”
The flight was short in time, it took them less than two hours to fly into the Centennial airport south of Denver. But it felt as though it took them forever to get there. There was so much she wanted to say to Jace, but now wasn’t the time. Nor was the car ride to Monument. She needed to wait until they were alone.
She wished now that she’d read more of Zack’s journals. Maybe if she had they would’ve offered some clue as to what Zack was thinking about their marriage during his deployment. Had he decided, in the same way Jace had, that she wasn’t cut out for their life together? Had he assumed she’d be unwilling to compromise so they could be together? Did he see her as being so selfish, she’d be unwilling, like Jace did?
They pulled into her parents driveway less than an hour after Ben landed the plane. Jace brought her bags to the front door.
“Aren’t you coming in?”
“Nah, I’m goin’ straight to Tucker’s. My family is stayin’ there.”
“Jace, we need to talk.”
“Actually we don’t. I’ve heard those words enough before to know exactly what they mean.”
He walked away and got in Ben’s car, without a second look.
“Well, hello,” her father said, greeting her at the door. “I wasn’t sure whether we’d see you for Christmas this year.”
“Hi Daddy. I wasn’t sure either, but here I am, delivered safe and sound.”
He looked behind her.
“They’re gone already. Jace and Ben dropped me off.”
“Nice of Ben to fly up to get you.”
“I know. Very nice.” She snuggled into her father’s arms. “I missed you. I’m so glad to be home.”
Bree’s mom came around the corner. “There she is!” she shouted. “I’ve been so worried about you. When you didn’t answer your cell, I didn’t know what to think.”
Bree hugged her mom, and then slipped off her coat, taking her cell phone out of her pocket. There were several missed calls from her mom, Blythe, and even Red.
“I’ll take your bag up to your old room,” her dad said.
“I’ll follow. I’d like to change,” she said to her mom.
“Go right ahead. I’ll heat up some soup. Come back down when you’re ready and we’ll catch up baby.”
Bree hugged her mother again before following her dad upstairs.
“I need to make a phone call, and then I’ll be down.”
“Take your time,” he answered, closing her bedroom door behind him.
She hit the call-back button and listened while the phone rang. The call went to voicemail.
“Hi Red, it’s Bree. I’m sorry to bother you, but something’s happened with Jace, and I need to talk to you. Can you call me back?”
Red must be growing weary of her neediness. She wished now that she’d hung up, that she hadn’t left that message. Red had his own life to live, she shouldn’t keep going to him for answers to her problems.
She knew what she had to do. She didn’t need to wait to hear back from Red.
“Hey Tuck. Hi Blythe,” Jace said when they greeted him at the back door.
“We sure are happy to see you,” said his mama from behind them.
“I’m happy to see you too,” he hugged her, and then his father. “Merry Christmas.”
“I expected Bree to be with you,” said Blythe.
“I dropped her at your parents’ place.”
“Huh. Well okay. I’m sure she’ll be here later, with them.”
“Uh yeah. Not sure.” Blythe looked at him with a puzzled expression. He wasn’t sure because he hadn’t asked. She probably would be, but that didn’t have anything to do with him. She’d be here because that’s where her family would be.
Tucker rubbed his chest, and grimaced.
“What’s wrong? Got indigestion from my cooking?” she teased.
“Not this time,” he answered right before she slugged him.
“Got a minute?” he said to Jace.
“Got nothin’ but,” Jace answered.
“Good. Follow me, I need your help with something. Don’t take your jacket off.”
Jace followed Tucker out the back door. He looked ahead at the barn he’d heard Tuck built, but hadn’t yet seen.
“That was quick.”
“Doesn’t take long to raise a barn,” Tucker answered. “Especially when Billy Patterson is involved.” They walked inside where almost every stall was full. “Gotta get some of these buckers to Crested Butte after the holidays.”
They were still working out the best way to organize how many bulls and bucking horses they kept at each ranch.
“Bullet’s got a spreadsheet, organized by rank. I don’t know how he ranks ’em, or what it all means.”
Once again, Bullet’s organizational skills and what appeared to be inherent insight into rough stock amazed Jace. Bullet reminded him of Billy. Billy had a knack for reading animals like Jace had never seen in another human being, until now.
“So tell me brother, what’s with the heartache?”
“I think Blythe was right, it’s just heartburn. It’ll pass.”